It can be helpful to take it down a notch, and relish in the small, simple things we take for granted. Notice and be grateful for the cast iron skillet that cooked your delicious meal. Tuck your body sumptuously into your soft sheets and feel your head resting on fluffy, clean pillows. Sit underneath your warm blanket and be aware that you have a safe resting spot on your couch. When we allow ourselves to feel gratitude for the everyday, simple things in our life, we raise our vibration and become more easily grateful for all things in our life - the good, and the not so good.
Read MoreDuring this tender time of necessary physical isolation, we can come together in soul and in spirit. This may be the silver lining to this devastating outbreak. It’s possible we are on the cusp of a great awakening, and a shift in our hearts and our values of what it means to be American.
Read MoreUnless we own our truth, admit who we are and what we need, we will always be betraying our Self. And self-betrayal leads to anxiety, depression, illness, and worse - lost identity. Not knowing who we are, and an inability to trust our own intuition, leaves us vulnerable to the whims and demands of everyone else. We become victims, because we feel we have no say.
Read MoreWhen I question whether I’m moving towards love or acting out of fear, I have to stop and observe my intentions as well as my body’s sensations. I take a deep breath. I find a quiet spot and 5 minutes of time. I do this often, for big decisions and for small. Our intuition feels sneakily like fear.
Read MoreBut by the end of that same class, as I lay on the floor in “Shavasana”, staring at the ceiling, smelling the musty floral scent, I envisioned all of the heartwarming moments that had unfolded here as well. Babies being baptized, surrounded by doting families. Weddings overflowing with love. Holiday services where the whole congregation sang as one. The sense of belonging that is felt so rarely these days. It all encapsulated the feeling of hope. And at that moment I realized that this church has absorbed life itself. The despair. The joy. And everything in between.
Read MoreWhen I avoid conflict for the sake of others, and to prevent my own temporary discomfort, I become victim to everyone else and every life circumstance that comes my way. Instead, I am learning to create my own reality.
Read MoreWe are always sending arrows of intention into the Universe. And the arrow will always land where it was aimed - that's physics. Luckily, unlike the Archery class I took in High School, I don't have to worry about my skill at lining up the arrow with the bullseye. In life, whatever our need, goal, or desire, the Universe will provide it. Sometimes quickly, and sometimes not quickly. That part isn't for us to decide.
Read MoreThis is why we return, again and again, to our practice. We return to remember who we are. We return because each time we taste the sweetness of acceptance, and a feeling that everything really will be ok, like a yummy dessert, we want to taste it again and again. We return because it is human nature to forget. We return because glimpsing the soul, as it's called in the 7th Limb of yoga, Dhyana (Meditation), is just that - a glimpse.
Read MoreI didn't stay fixed on the ONE final decision, but I moved forward anyway, with many tiny decisions that eventually gave me the strength and the knowing that separation from my husband was the right thing. It was like collecting data for a science project except the project was me and the experiment was my life. By not remaining still, by moving forward despite, by trusting the unknown, more was revealed along the way.
It turns out, what I thought was a decision to end my marriage was actually so much more.
This month, I am challenging myself (and you) to do one small thing. Instead of piling a monstrous undertaking onto myself and my circumstance, and then abandoning ship when I can't follow through, I choose an attainable, close-up goal. I choose a honed-in view, something I can see and almost reach.
Read MoreA good way to acknowledge an intuitive thought is to follow up - when an idea comes into your head, while driving, walking, or working, and you are unsure if it's real, or you want to know more, continue to ask yourself questions.
Asking questions at least acknowledges that something spoke to you. Treat your inner voice like a friend, or the most perfect and free life coach. Get curious, and ask questions like, "What did you mean by that?" "Interesting, I hadn't thought of it that way..." "How exactly should I proceed?" "That's a lot, what's the next small step I can take?"
Don't be deceived, if you are on a journey to uncover your pain, if you are actively seeking a new lifestyle, a new perspective, or a new way of talking to yourself, the journey will look a lot like falling down and trying to get back up. The journey will look like you can't get it right - until you do. Removing layers of self doubt, self criticism, and self hatred takes a lot of practice. We've been so conditioned to play the role and not let anyone see our true nature that we are bound to feel and look uncomfortable along the way.
Read MoreWe forgo our instincts in the name of logic. We are unsettled in our job, but afraid to make a change. We don't want to take the next step until we have more pieces in place, just to be sure. We don't want to be wrong. Our heart screams at us in the form of frustration, impatience, or unhappiness, and we still tell ourselves we need more time. We are not ready to commit to a choice because it's too scary when we don't know the full picture. So we delay any movement at all. We stand still. We crave something we can explain to others. We don’t feel comfortable or wise saying, "My heart made me do it."
But why not?
Part of moving on from my marriage has been learning to be independent - financially, emotionally, as a parent, and as a home owner. I have learned that I am my own rescuer, not someone else. Relying on people is good, but not at the expense of disregarding our own capabilities and worth. I am no different on my own than I was when I was married - I only believed the illusion that life was easier and safer with a partner.
Read MoreIn yoga, we access our true Self through the body. This fascinates me. We should not pretend that our body is merely physical, as if it supports our life and our organs, but that’s it. We should not lie and say the physical body does not matter. Our entire society is obsessed with people’s bodies! So it matters. But yoga is not appearance and it’s not clothes. It’s not poses or flexibility. It’s not toned muscles and perfect Warrior poses. Yoga is a journey, and a path to truth and enlightenment.
Read MoreEmbarking on a quest brings tail wagging excitement upon anticipation. Images scroll through your mind, and you of course create a rendition of the final product – the photo snapped when you finally reach the mountain’s peak. But in the middle of the process, as you are climbing, thirsty, and with aching muscles, your mind forgets the initial euphoria and you wonder if all of it was a dream, or worse, a crazy, futile aspiration.
Read MoreThe endurance of cleaning out closets and re-purposing rooms provides a kind of strength, a cleansing, and possibly a rebirth. My identity begins to reveal itself in every room, in the pale pink walls, the over-stuffed bookshelves, and the all-white chandelier.
My upward dog gets stronger the more I flow, and I let go of what it should look like, and simply do what feels best for me.
Read MoreThe greatest lesson I’ve learned in life is that my path is not my plan. I can’t hold onto anything. Nothing is mine – not even my own boys. I get to guide them, teach them, and observe them in awe, but the path God has set for them is not up to me. I am a witness to their journey, and hopefully I can honor that position.
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